I am truly humbled:
http://en.tackfilm.se/?id=1272632925995RA57
Apr 29 2010
Wherein our hero gets closer to the 1hr commute!
I’m getting so close to the magical one hour or under commute to work (by bike) I can practically taste it
Details of the ride, should the iframe above not display, can be seen at http://connect.garmin.com/activity/31615124.
I haven’t been cycling as much in the last fortnight as I had previously, but I’m still aiming for/achieving at least 160km (100 miles)/week. It’s a good base mileage which I can start improving my fitness base. I intend to start interval training on the ride in, that should tire me appropriately!
My bike’s scheduled for a service this coming weekend, which is good at it coincides with Zachary coming to stay so I wouldn’t be cycling anyway. It needs good adjustments on the brakes, gears, seat and the chain can probably do with oiling too. When I have it back, I will be repositioning the parts of the cadence meter as it’s been slipping down the pedal crank and providing very spotty information.
Apr 28 2010
VPN-Mesh for multi-offsite backup
Over the last couple of weeks I’ve joined in with discussions and plans for a group of friends to set up a VPN-mesh so (legal) data can be stored on each other’s networks.
Once the VPN side of things is set up, we’ll each be providing space for the other members to store data they wouldn’t want to lose in an fire/jealous girlfriend deletion rage/whatever. The mechanism of distributing the data hasn’t been decided, and would likely depend on the source OS – I, for instance, will likely use some kind of rsync solution.
Last night, the first two nodes were connected; on one end, a Draytek 2820n router and the other a pfSense box. We have chosen IPsec as the tunnel protocol, and will aim to use that throughout all the node interconnects.
This morning we’ve established forward and reverse DNS look-ups via the tunnel so name resolution of individual hosts on remote subnets is possible.
The main issue with using a mesh is there’s a limit on the total number of members – a lot of routers can only maintain a limited number of tunnels, eg. the Draytek 2820n only supports 32. Also, as more members join, the additional work required to fully integrate them increases. However, as the idea here is to provide storage space for people who trust us with their prized data (photos, home videos etc), it won’t ever extend beyond a handful of nodes. Because of this key point, we can safely ignore that limitation for this project.
It’s going to be challenging, with a number of obstacles to overcome – not least the different routers people are running and operating systems in use – there’s already Windows XP/7, Linux and Mac OS X – but it’s rewarding seeing it come together, and I’m sure it’ll prove its worth over time.
Apr 27 2010
Non-resident parents and bank holiday weekends
This upcoming weekend, so I was reminded yesterday, is a bank holiday weekend; three days without work. I also happens to be my weekend with Zachary and the precedence is that if it’s my weekend on a bank holiday, I have him for the extended period.
I call his mum to double check.
Me: I’ve got Zachary for the long weekend this weekend, yeah?
Emma: What do you mean the long weekend?
Me: It’s a bank holiday.
Emma: Did we arrange that?
Me: Well, I assumed that as I had him for the weekend, I’d have him for the extended weekend.
Emma: Well why did you assume that?
Me: Because that’s what happens when I take him on bank holiday weekends.
Emma: That’s not written anywhere, that’s not normal.
Me: Before when I’ve had him over the bank holiday weekends, I’ve had him until the Monday.
Emma: Well, rather than just starting off assuming, why don’t you ask?
Me: *sigh*
After further negotiation, the end result is that I’ve got Zachary for the long weekend, which I’m very happy about!
When it comes to access to children, the courts prefer if the parents can come to arrangements between themselves – if that’s managed then it’s more flexible than a court imposed one and ultimately it’s better for all involved.
Emma and I have had an agreement in place since we split up. This details my access to Zachary but allows a certain amount of flexibility which has worked well for us so far – my work frequently sends me abroad for 2-3 weekend periods and of course events come up with one or other of us would like to attend.
By no means do I wish to imply I have a battle to see Zachary, but I’m very surprised at last night’s negotiation. If the “That’s not written anywhere” card is going to be pulled, is there any option other than to firm up arrangements legally and suffer the consequence of inflexibility? I, for one, would be sad to see that happen, especially as nowadays, Zachary often asks to stay with me for longer than two nights over a weekend.
Apr 26 2010
Sun! Party! Films! Hurrah!
After my Saturday morning fun, I switched to shorts, t-shirt and went for a lazy walk around Bromley, taking in steak and a visit to Hotel Chocolat for some party gifts.
That evening I headed to Foots Cray and to a party/small gathering hosted by Ara where many hours were spent being pedantic, telling jokes and learning about LARPing.
LARPing, while not something I’d participate in myself, does sound good fun. I’m not sure my imagination is quite at the level I’d be able to enjoy it fully. Maybe one day.
I made noises to leave around 1am and K, who I’d first met at Poggs and Sarah’s house warming, asked for a lift. Greenwich wasn’t too far out of my way, so I dropped her home and then went home to write a reflective post before knocking myself out with my usual cocktail.
I woke on Sunday very aware that my kitchen is due to be started this week. With that in mind, I started moving the contents into the living room, throwing away crap I didn’t need and then removing the cupboard doors (using a screwdriver == manly!).
When done, and at a loose end, I arranged to meet up with K and grab some food. We headed to Friends of Mine in Beckenham and I chowed down my second steak in as many days. After the sunshine went away we watched The Ghost Writer. It’s a good film, though a little long for my liking.
Later, because the London Marathon route was by her house and driving would be a nightmare, I deposited K on a train home and I went to sleep.
Today I’m feeling good. I didn’t cycle to work – that’s a treat for tomorrow. And speaking of cycling – I need to book my bike in for its six week check up. I hope it’s healthy.
Apr 25 2010
Feelings of sadness
Driving home from the party tonight, I was overcome with feelings of sadness. I don’t know what it is about cruising through the empty streets, no-doubt breaking the speed limit, feeling the calm around, which brings these feelings.
I can’t remember what my mind turned to before during these times, but now it falls to Austin, and the beautiful girl I fell in love with.
I miss the talks we used to have, the laughter on the phone. I know that only rarely now will my phone go beep and it be an SMS from her.
Previous relationships, I’ve done my best to drop all contact when they’ve ended. And they have all ended – as someone joked to me a while ago when dishing out relationship advice, ‘I have a number of very successful relationships behind me.’ But really, it’s not a joke, it’s the sad truth. But in this case I don’t want to stop contact. I still love hearing from her. I’m not used to this.
I wonder if I will ever have what it takes to build a long lasting, positive relationship with anyone. I fear I’m following in my father’s footsteps: he had two children by my age, from two different mothers too. The only difference between him and I is he married the mothers.
At the moment, through the therapy I’m doing, I’m getting in touch with emotions I’d banished away, ones I’d deemed unnecessary, ones I felt were detrimental to my life, and ones which tried to lead me from a logical path.
It seems I’d got it wrong. It turns out you need these emotions. They’re what allow people to build genuine connections with you, to build bonds which go beyond the superficial. They allow people to see the real you, the, to quote my therapist, “humanistic side of you”.
But it’s hard allowing yourself to experience things you’ve been stopping yourself doing for so long. Sometimes it makes me want to laugh, often to cry. Maybe this process and development will allow me to come to terms with the death of Stephanie. I know that’s something I’ve locked away for a very long time, and I feel I want to.
But whatever happens, it’s too late for the girl in Austin, and right now, that makes me very sad.
Apr 24 2010
A weekend ride into the countryside
I spend a few hours this morning pootling around the London/Surrey/Kent countryside. On route I saw one of my ex-bosses, so stopped to chat with him and his wife for a short while. I also, unfortunately, failed in my attempt at a long 16% gradient hill in Titsley.
Details, if the iframe doesn’t display are at http://connect.garmin.com/activity/31049950.
This ride is the same total distance as I cover on my rides to work (in+out), but required far more energy and time due to the sheer number of hills involved. I’m not (yet) a hill climber.
Apr 23 2010
Random waffelings
Some bullet points for you, because I’m feeling lazy:
- Ran out of mirtazapine last night and overcompensated with alprazolam. End result, slept very well, over slept, woke groggy. Oops.
- Picked up more mirtazapine this morning.
- Looking forward to partying tomorrow night.
- Had a day off cycling to work. Body last night was screaming for a rest, so a rest it got.
- Met up with friend/ex-colleague last night. Was good to see him and we spent hours chatting and catching up.
- Hamish fancies coming cycling with me, we’re making plans to go out in a few weeks. I’m very happy/excited about this.
- Considering switch my site over to Drupal.
- Probably won’t switch over to Drupal as there’s a lot of work involved and setting redirects for all blog posts would be a nightmare.
- Am settling into work again nicely. Productivity’s shooting up again, the groove is appearing.
Apr 22 2010
Wherein our hero keeps pushing himself
Following Tuesday’s monumental effort on the journey home (previously), my goal is to manage the commute in an hour or less.
Today I nearly hit that, taking 1:04:27. The four minutes over can easily be accounted for by the traffic, traffic lights and my stopping to tuck my right trouser leg into my sock (yes, until I’ve proper long cycling trousers, I’m one of those).
Correlated with the new fastest time comes my new highest average speed: 25.5kph (15.8mph). Only accounting for ‘moving time’ brings this up to 26.1kph (16.2mph).
I’m delighted.
Details, if the iframe above doesn’t display on syndicated blogs, can be found at http://connect.garmin.com/activity/30853902.
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